The Road Less Traveled

The Road Not Taken

By: Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,  

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could 

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair, 

And having perhaps the better claim,  

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there  

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.  

Oh, I kept the first for another day! 

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,  

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh   

Somewhere ages and ages hence:  

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—  

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

The Road Less Traveled

By: Stephen Maddox

     Live the dream is a common phrase but a road less traveled. The person that impressed it on me was Lee Burns, a staff member I met at Hillsong Church while I was in Sydney, Australia. This is not a new concept or even a foreign concept but it is a great challenge.

     Are you living the dream? If not, why? Take a minute and ask yourself. Am I living the dream? If not, why?

I can’t say it definitively, but I would guess that most of the reasons you came up with are not the real reason. Those are the reasons that help you sleep better at night. You can give me every reason, excuse, fault, situation, but you are the one that is to blame. Rise above, endure, outlast, fight on, don’t give up, don’t give in, dream on. Let the past be the past, and let the present be the present.

What is “it” you’ve always wanted to do? If you aren’t doing “it”, why? I understand being realistic and the need to sustain a living, but every day should be lived to the fullest. If you aren’t doing something each day to make your dreams a reality than you wasted a day. Waste too many and it becomes a year or a lifetime.

I have read countless biographies and autobiographies of people that sacrificed it all to make a difference and live their dream. Salinger, Hemingway, King, and countless others had multiple stories and writing pieces turned down before they came to fame. They lived on nothing, some with families, until they were able to make their dreams a reality.

I’m not saying you have to quit your job and live your life in hopeless abandonment. I’m saying fight the fear and live the adventure.

Make a list of every dream you have no matter how silly or small. It helps to visualize your dream. After you have made a dream your reality cross it off and move onto the next one.

Can you imagine if people like Edison, Newton, Gates, Jobs, Franklin, Einstein, and Tesla had not lived their lives to the fullest and dreamed big dreams. This is not a heavily traveled road, but it should be.

I have not turned every dream I have into a reality, but each day I am living my dream and each day I am doing something that continues to bring my dreams to a reality. Some are outlandish and will not be done without God’s help, but I enjoy the journey. Traveling the road less traveled isn’t lonely, just a more select group. Don’t let your life be the road not taken, but the road less traveled.

Frankie the Revolutionist (Happy 1st Birthday)

Dear Frankie,

You’ve turned one year old, and they weren’t joking that this times goes fast.

You’ve taught me so much in your first year. You are a revolutionary for the fact that you’ve revolutionized my life.

The thought of kids scared me to begin with. Growing up as the youngest I never had younger siblings. So it took awhile for the idea of kids to grow on me. But then it took three years and a miscarriage before it finally happened. I had more growing up to do and needed to make some things right before the Lord knew I would be ready. And now, thankfully, I have you. I also know that if it hadn’t taken that amount of time, we might not have had you, and that thought disturbs me.

I couldn’t have asked for a better first child, but the thought of a girl scared me. I’m a man’s man and didn’t know how the girl thing would work, but the Lord knew what he was doing, for if I had had a boy first I would have been a harder parent. I don’t lack in discipline, but I would have probably been too harsh. But since you own me around your little finger you’ve worked on me like no son could have. You see, you’ve taught me what true compassion is and how to care about others.

Having you also opened my eyes to a truer concept of God’s love. Because anyone that can send his son to bare the ultimate punishment of every person’s sin and die the cruelest death can show no greater love. I can’t even comprehend the thought of turning my back on you as you suffer someone else’s debt.

You’ve taught me there is every reason to be open minded and to be as curious as I used to be with every experience. To abandon the jadedness and cynicism for the idea of what fun life can be. This one is a work in progress, but you’ve started me down the path. And I can’t thank you enough for that.

You’ve taught me that life is not all about myself. In order to be a good parent I’ve learned that selfishness needs to cease, or at least decrease. I’m not perfect at this, but I’m working hard to make sure this is true in my life.

Frankie, I want you to always remember this. I love you and always will.

As you get older, even now at times, I am going to frustrate the snot out of you (your mom can tell you about this first hand), but I will always love you. You won’t be perfect and you will make mistakes, but I will always love you. You won’t hit the mark, and you might disappoint me at times, but I will always love you. There is never a time you can’t talk to me, there is nothing you can do that you can’t tell me. I love you and I always will.

I’ll say right now, the mistakes I make as a father, I’m sorry. I will always try my best, but I too will never be perfect.

You are the apple of my eye; you are the delight of my heart, and I can’t be thankful enough that you are in my life. To many more years, adventures, dances, naps, play times, meals, and times I can’t comprehend at this moment. I love you and I always will.

   Love,

 Your Dad

I Play Guitar for Matchbox 20

     I used to work downtown in Chicago and would take the train back and forth. If you haven’t ridden a train into the city you probably aren’t familiar with the protocol. So I will educate you.

     First, you pick an empty seat when possible. Sitting next to someone on the train, unless absolutely necessary, is just creepy and weird. Although there are more people in large cities it has the adverse effect in that most often you know less people than a small town person might know. Small town people want to know one another. City people, most of the time, do not want to know one another. There are people that will continue to walk from train car to train car just to see if there is an empty seat. It is simple train etiquette.

     Second, you don’t look at people as you walk by them on the train. It is best to think everyone is in their own world. I used to call the three-foot circle around me the danger zone. Thanks Top Gun. Again, it’s creepy to look at people. Up there with Hannibal Lector.

     Third, if you absolutely, most positively, must sit next to someone, you don’t talk. People may say hello, do a head nod, or most likely just a polite smile. Passengers tend to read on the train, whether a book, nook, kindle, iPad, newspaper, magazine, computer, cell phone, whatever. They may also just sit and listen to music on their iPod. They may sleep or rest their eyes. But conversation is just too far past the norm.

     One day on my way home a young lady sat next to me. Honestly, I don’t remember what she looks like. Couldn’t even tell you what she was wearing. Made that much of an impression. Not saying she wasn’t someone to remember, I just didn’t care enough to attempt to remember. As I was staring out the window my tactic was to leave my computer bag on the seat next to me so people would take another seat and use me as a last resort. She asked to sit there. I moved the bag while holding my gaze out the window. Then she made the fatal error. She said the doomed phrase.

“What did you do downtown today?”

I slowly moved my head and looked at her. I probably sat there silent for a few seconds, but what felt like hours, because of the pure shock that someone said something to me. I could hear whispers around me as if the girl wore the scarlet letter just for opening her mouth in front of people.

“Well, I was working,” I replied.

“What do you do for work?” she persisted.

At that point, I figured if we were going to keep this going I was going to entertain myself as much as I was going to entertain her.

I proceeded to tell her how I was the lead guitarist for Matchbox 20 and was recording our new album at a famous studio downtown. I continued on that my family lived out in the suburbs (the only truth to this story) and that I was heading out there to have dinner with them before I came back into the city to finish recording. Our new album would be out in the fall and it was going to be landmark.

As I heard the Oak Forest exit I stood up, said excuse me, and walked on towards the door. As I walked down the aisle, gullible girl said to have a great dinner. I waved and walked out the door.

I never saw this person again. The ironic thing is that Matchbox 20 was apparently working on an album at that time. And it released that fall. Some person out there was telling her friends how she met their lead guitarist, most likely bought that album (it was fine, but not their best), and has the story of a lifetime. Although when she saw the picture of the guys on the album, I would imagine she realized I wasn’t in the band.

There are some morals to the story.

First, talk to people on the train. You can’t make a mark in this life or make a difference if you don’t talk to people. You may not start with what were you doing downtown, but interacting with people shouldn’t be discouraged. There are of course times where discretion and thought should go through your mind before you start an interaction, but nonetheless, enjoy humanity. You can learn a lot from situations that weren’t anything more than sitting with someone you don’t know.

Secondly, I realized I was a born storyteller, but that can also be used for evil. Without ever telling the person it was a joke and a funny story (I have a snobby sense of humor) it was ultimately a lie. And as harmless as it may seem, everything starts small. Even sin. I have plenty of stories that I’ve told as a joke at someone else’s expense, but I haven’t done that in a long time. It’s easier to pull out a weed when it’s small than to wait until its roots are deep in the foundation.

Next stop, Tinley Park.

Off the Grid on Vacation

           We recently took vacation. It fell on our seven-year anniversary and concluded a packed six weeks of events. We started with rehearsals for Easter, Men’s Conference 2011 and its rehearsal, more Easter rehearsals, District Council, Easter Dress Rehearsal, Easter Express, Easter, Easter clean up, Women’s Rally, choir loft clean up, and graduations for CBC, EU, and Ozark High School. As well as it has been non-stop from last year’s women’s conference in October, through Christmas, up until the six weeks packed with events. I don’t complain about the work or dislike it. I’m a workaholic and am not afraid of work. This is what I signed up for and love it.

     This time I took my vacation a little differently though. I did my due diligence in making sure that everything I could thinking of, imagine, or come up with was discussed, delegated, and taken care of. I then e-mailed those that I work for and lined out what was taken care of and concluded my e-mail that I would be turning off my e-mail, ringer, and vibrate function on my phone. I also left it upside down on my nightstand so I wouldn’t see any pop-ups, even in my peripheral (thanks Brian Regan). Lastly, I explained I wouldn’t be on Twitter, Facebook, or blogging either.

     I had the best and most relaxing vacation ever. And it took completely cutting myself off from all outside interaction.

            Cell phones are an addiction. I will admit I felt in my pocket for my phone at the beginning of my vacation. It’s a fun device to mess with while bored waiting for nothing. But this allowed me to focus completely and totally on my wife and daughter. To work the hours it takes and have a good home front I felt this was necessary. I told our families the best way to contact us so we weren’t completely cut off in case of emergency.

     During the vacation I was able to watch my daughter transition from the army crawl to the full crawl. I was able to watch her learn how to pity/sympathy laugh. She now consistently can say Dad or Dada, the dog, one of the cat’s names (Hunter pronounced huntor/unter and Dexter pronounced deter) and other words. She babbles in conversation with me. She babbles in conversation with herself. We went on family walks, watched movies, went places together, and enjoyed one another's company.

     I was able to read 3.5 books as well. Finished Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyer, and read BabyWise II, Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom, and Ford County by John Grisham.

     On your next vacation I dare you to completely unplug and enjoy your family. No one will care if they miss your constant social network updates and pictures. And if you feel like it is completely necessary you can do it your first day back to the online civilization. You will have the most refreshing time away that you can’t fathom. And your family will enjoy being with you as well. You might owe it to them.